My Characteristics of a Wonderful Woman, Part Four

If you have been waiting for the next edition of this very irregular series, I pray you haven’t been holding your breath as you surely would have died by the time I finally got back to writing another post. If you have not been following this series, here is the first, here is the second, and here is the third.

Another characteristic that shows me a great deal is how she is able to deal with adversity. No matter how we would like to package life, trouble and problems are part and parcel of everyday living. A true defining element of one’s personality is their ability (or lack thereof) to cope with those moments and challenges that assail us. Some people simply “go to pieces” when confronted with the harsh realities of life; others are able to take the crushing blows of tragedy and sorrow and actually learn from them to make them count for the good in their daily lives.

You see, none of us escape the pains of this world. So all of us have the opportunity to demonstrate how we will handle those moments which may stretch into days, months, and even years. Do we attempt to go it alone, stoically charging ahead knowing that if we only can apply our skills and abilities, we could beat this problem or situation only to finally realize that’s not going to happen?

Or do we seek the counsel of others, those who have experience in dealing with similar issues to learn from them in order that we can be prepared for what lies ahead?

Or do we ask our Heavenly Father for His help, knowing that He is always with us and He will never fail us? Sure, there are times when it seems as if God has let us down, but when we do the postmortem we will have to admit we were the ones who left God, He didn’t leave us.

I suspect that for many of us it is a combination of all three and as we become wiser our percentage of who we lean on first changes–from ourselves to our Lord.

As we go through the dating process, it may not be so obvious to us whether the person we are with is or is not handling adversity well simply because we all tend to shield each other from those moments. But they will pop up at the most inopportune times and they will give us a clear window into the soul of the one we are with.

I have had the advantage of knowing my fiance for many years and I have seen her in many situations where she has faced adversity. Did she always handle it like I would have? No. But that doesn’t mean she handled it incorrectly. She took care of it in the best way for her at that point in her life using the resources God had given her. And for that I thank the Lord in how she came through those times in her life. Those times of stress and trial made her stronger and a more faithful child of God. That is the greatest gift God could give her–and me.

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